How to build courage to approach women with zero fear and not caring about rejections – Complete Guide

Jump to drill:

Day 1
Day 2
Day 3
Day 4

Download list of the drills of the week 1

So here’s is the guide how you can build a hard core of inner confidence of not giving a f@#k about rejections and how to approach women confidently with no fear.

As you now know my background, I started this journey by going alone to bars. That put me really uncomfortable situations and wasn’t probably best way to start this. But the real improvement when I got completely rid of my approach anxiety happened after I started applying these drills in this method on daytime.

They put me even more far of my comfort zone than going to bars, as daytime approaching isn’t as socially acceptable as on nighttime. When I did these on daytime, I really wasn’t anymore afraid to go on night time alone, actually very confident. The routine of my life was at that time: weekdays doing daytime approaches/dates and on the weekend bars.

I have done every of these drills myself. I was really nervous first to approach people sober on daytime, so I little by little started it by asking directions and took things further like you will see in the method.

This program is designed to get rid of your approach anxiety, making you more confident on social situations and being comfortable around girls. It starts from very baby steps, and I recommend to follow each day. The order of drills are meant to be cumulative so they become harder little by little, and you expand your comfort zone slowly. You basically break your limits on every drill and become more confident every day.

The drills will put you in awkward situations, but don’t worry, when you put yourself enough of these kind of situations, you develop a habit of not caring what other people think. Even if the drills sounds stupid and ridiculous to do, trust me, they work. In time you see a not big deal to approach hot girl and flirt with her.

In this program there are 15 days of different drills, but you don’t have to do them all a row. You may acquire phone numbers during these drills, so it’s better to turn them instantly to dates and follow the program when you have time again. Don’t keep though too long break between the drills.

If the drills become too hard and you think you can’t do it, repeat the earlier drills until you become enough confident to start the next drill. Every time it feels bad to go for it, but the prize of this is huge. You need to remember it. For me this was firstly a very uncomfortable, but I kept going and finally reached the point when I enjoyed doing this.

Try to apply the behavior mentioned in the book (Download link for sample book), in the Chapter 2, like relaxed body language and charismatic behavior in these drills, so they will become natural behavior of yours in time.

It’s awesome feeling when you finally get rid of the approach anxiety and won’t think a second to approach girl you are attracted to. You will get there if you do these enough, I promise.

Good luck!

WEEK 1 – Babysteps to break the anxiety to approach strangers

Day 1

This takes about 1 hour per day, depending on your distances to downtown. 1 hour per day is not much time to sacrifice, especially as you know how much this will improve your life.

The first week is basically breaking the ice and starting slowly learning to not give a fuck. Don’t focus at this point for getting laid, the only goal is to build up your confidence.

To make this comfortable enough and not taking things too far from the start, we start on the daytime.

Go to downtown example, where you know you are safe and there are lot of strangers, so you won’t face people you know already.

The first drill is to warm you up and make you feel outgoing. The drills coming afterwards are going to make you feel awkward, and it’s good as you’ll become immune for that, but let’s first start something that isn’t awkward. By asking directions.

Ask minimum of 10 strangers for directions. No matter either they are males or females. The conversations don’t need to be long. Example:

You: ”Hello, sorry?”

Stranger: ”Yes?”

You: ”Do you know where is the train station?”

Stranger: ”Just walk 5 minutes to left and …..”

You: ”Thank you!”

At the beginning you don’t need to be the talking one, but you can ask the questions. By going talking to strangers you are learning habit to become outgoing and having convos with anyone.

Now if you want even more improvement, try to keep these conversations a little bit longer, example asking more detailed questions or giving statements:

You: ”Hello, sorry?”

Stranger: ”Yes?”

You: ”Do you know where is the train station?”

Stranger: ”Just walk 5 minutes to left and …..”

You: ”Okay, so it takes about 15 minutes to get there?”

Stranger: ”Yes about”

You: ”Right, thank you so much! I got so lost here, don’t hang often here haha”

Stranger: ”Hopefully you find there!”

You: ”Actually do you know either there is faster way to get in the [place x] than train?”

Stranger: ”I’m not sure sorry”

You: ”Okay no problem, I’ll take the train then”

After doing this 10 times, congratulations, the first day and drill is done.

Day 2

Today we are going to push comfort zone little bit far and go for more awkward situations. Remember, even you’ll feel awkward and maybe embarrassed, you will get improvement. In time you’ll be immune to all of these feelings. Imagine how good feeling it must be to not feel a shame? You need to put yourself in these uncomfortable situations.

So let’s start on the daytime as we did on day 1.

Start doing the day 1 drill, asking directions for 5 times now to warm you up.

Drill 2

Say ”Hi” 15 people that are walking past you. Nothing else. Only take eye contact and say ”Hi”, and walk past them. Again, no matter either they are females or males. Also you don’t need to push this and say ”hi” for every stranger that are walking past you, but you can take it slow and walk a little bit then greet. Then again walk a little bit and greet again.

This is awkward moment probably both of you. It feels weird to greet some random stranger on street and not saying anything for them. But I guarantee by doing this awkward drill highly lowers the attempt for going talk to strangers and improves your approach anxiety a lot. Next time when you are going actually talking to strangers, you’ll feel much better as you already did awkward approaches by only greeting.

On the other hand, this is good exercise at the beginning, as you throw yourself into awkward situation but immediately be safe as you walk past them. Remember, you are not likely encountering on them ever again so it doesn’t matter what they think of you.

After doing this 15 times, the day 2 drills are done. You are good to go, the drills will become slowly harder as you go furthern.

Day 3

Warming up with day 1 drill, but this time do this for group of people. Example go for group of 3 people and ask them for directions. You need to learn to put yourself to interact with multiple people, as you later approach group of girls, so you get used to this. Do this 5 times.

A harder varitation of Drill 2

This will be a way more awkward for you, but also kills greatly your approach anxiety and the feeling of shame. Basically, do the drill 2 and say ”Hi” to strangers, but this time do it a row for next 10 people that are walking past you. Even if there is a 3 people walking a few meter distance between them, say hi to all of them. This will feel very awkward, but trust me, you are about to become immune for the feel of shame.

Also, this time you can’t choice for whom you are going to greet with. The 10 must be in order, if you skip one of them, reset this drill and try again until you greet 10 people in a row. By knowing you need to reset the drill if you fail pushes you to out of your comfort zone. When I did these drills, I used to fail at after greeting like 6 people and then starting over. Just force youself out of your comfort zone and do it for 10 times a row, you can then gladly complete this day drill with great improvement of killing the approach anxiety.

Day 4

Again warming up like on the day 3 by going for group of people and asking example for directions. Do this 5 times.

Drill 3

You may be wondering when it’s time to go for girls and stop this nonsense of putting yourself in awkward situations. Today we start it. We have done now enough of approaching the strangers, and it’s time to start building the confidence for being outgoing around girls.

We start this still slowly by doing indirect approachess. The goal is not yet to try to pick them up, as this gives you a pressure of getting rejected, but to get used to talk with girls.

Approach a girl who is walking alone and you find attractive. Ask again direction for train station example. This time try to have a small talk with her instead of walking away after getting the directions. Try to change the topics if you are going out of words, like the bolded ones in this example:



Her: ”I’m not sure sorry”

You: ”Okay no problem, I’ll take the train then. Are you shopping here by the way?

Her: ”Yes, trying at least”

You: ”Have you found anything yet?”

Her: ”Not yet”

You: ”I don’t come here shopping often, it’s long time since last time. I think I bought a christmas present back then.

Her: ”Haha, it’s long time since christmas.”

You: ”Yes it is, I’m glad about it. Always stressed when I’m trying to get ideas for presents.”

Her: ”Yes, it’s stressful time”

You: ”Just remembered that I have my good female friend’s birthday coming soon. This is random but have you any gift ideas as a woman haha?” (By saying you have women in your social circle raises your status)

Her: ”Haha, some haircare products maybe?” (or whatever she recommends)

You: ”Excellent, thank you so much! Sorry for bothering you this much.”

Her: ”Haha no problem”

You: ”Anyway, it was nice to have conversation with you, have a good day!”

Her: ”Yes it was, you too!”

Try to get the conversation to last a minute or two, you can use that example conversation if you have no idea what to talk about. If you have courage, you can even ask her phone number after end of the conversation, but it’s not must. We are going there later anyway.

Do the ’Drill 3’ five times. Some girls may keep walking even after you approached them, but in this drill you can count them as success. So basically approach 5 girls and try to have a short small talk with them. You’ll also see that other’s respond more positively than others. You will start recognizing the variance and that some people are negative and some are friendly. This is what I talked about hot the dating game works.

Get rest of the drills of the first week below (free download)

week1program.pdf (254 downloads)

Second week program to become confident and playful around girls

The second part of the program. In this eBook the drills are getting harder and goal is to build strong core of confidence around girls and becoming playful. Sign up newsletter below and get this eBook for free! (You’ll get download link in email)

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