I’ve been suffering from major depression twice. First one was after my breakup, and the second one after withdrawing from insomnia medication.
With major depression I don’t mean laziness, lethargicness, too tired to do anything, nothing is interesting. I had complete anhedonia. I couldn’t get pleasure out of anything. It was pure pain. All was just grey. When I woke up, all I wanted to was to get back to sleep. This bad it was from the medication induced withdrawal. On the breakup induced depression it wasn’t this bad and I could get shit done(still not 100%), unlike on the medication induced depression where my energy levels were complete zero.
Motivation after breakup induced depression
After the breakup I HAD TO go get new girls. It was must. Even I had very low to zero libido, I wasn’t there for sex, it was a validation thing. I had to get some rebound sex for getting over an ex. It was my only motivation, I hadn’t any other motivation in my life to do any other thing. I was feeling most of the day shit. Couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep. Only after few weeks I started to get back to gym and healthy lifestyle. Picking up I started on the same week I break up.
Less success while depressed
The thing was, sadly, I got more rejections than I ever had have on the moment I required the success most. It was combination of rusty pickup skills and the depression. Even I went very low bf, lowest I ever was (8%), and I was more attractive looking than ever, the depression made some kind of aura on me that made girls go away.
Maybe it was the facial expressions I didn’t notice, looking depressed, hopeless, sad; that made me unattractive. Also, depression lowers testosterone levels, so it might have some effect on pheromeones.
Good looks with depression = Lower success
This proves that looks isn’t everything. I was better looking than ever before, instead I had more rejections than ever.
If I remember right, it was around month 2 post breakup time when I got my first lay. I was getting out of the worst depression I had, now was left only bitterness for me getting cheated on.
After that it started to roll again. Roll more than ever again.
My motivation for game went intense. I did Tinder. I did Daygame. I did Club game on many days a week. At gym my lifts skyrocketed.
Anyway, back to the topic, about how depression affects your attractiveness (even mild depression). Even if you are good looking, but you are suffering from depression, there is something that makes you less attractive. The depression need to get cured.
It’s vicious cycle thought. Example, if you are depressed because you aren’t getting girls, you are just making yourself less attractive and even lowering your chances to get girls. Also if you are depressed due to low testosterone levels, your testosterone levels drops because you are depressed, and you are depressed because of low testosterone levels.
At those kind of situation where depression is chemical imbalance in brain, like withdrawing from a drug, it’s okay to get depression medication for getting things done and getting where you want.
Find the roots
If you are depressed. Find the roots of causing it, and start to fix it. On the breakup depression I could fix it by getting things I had to done (rebound sex, new experiences). On the withdrawal depression I just had to suffer it, time healed.
Depression can stop you to ever start doing this stuff, self improvement and approaching girls. If you are on major depression, it’s probably even hard to read this post, I know if it’s pure anhedonia, nothing feels like it can ever get better. Get help from doctor to get some relieving medication to get shit done and start bettering your life.
If the depression is not major depression, you can start this stuff. I had mild depression due to lack of attention of girls and being a virgin. I could start doing this stuff, and getting better for it, getting a girlfriend, and then crashed again even deeper than I was at the beginning. After raising there it’s been again great.